I'm not sure where to begin. I've learned so many things during the preparatory phase, during the journey, and even in the weeks since. This entry might be a little disjointed and random simply because I want to record thoughts about different parts. I think I'll just make a list.
1. Those called to prepare the way work hard and for a long time. Having never been on a youth handcart trek before, I really had no idea as to the scope of the needed preparations. Choosing a theme, a theme song, calling a youth committee, calling couples to serve as mas & pas, calling a cooking crew, medical staff and just figuring out how to get everyone there had to happen about 6 months in advance. Afterwards came months of gathering the needed items, training the parents, youth committee, multitudes of phone calls, firesides, hiking activities, learning a couple of square dances, and more. Gratefully the Hales brothers, Maloy and Dave, have been on many treks. They knew just what to do and when to do it. I admit to hanging on to their coattails just following along hoping to be a help instead of a hindrance. They graciously gave me assignments and let me help, but never truly overloaded me. They have been so great!
The couples called to be ma's and pa's did amazing things with gathering tents and other supplies for their trek families. Many of them gave up vacation time at work in order to be on trek. So often as I would sit in a ma & pa training meeting, I would look around and be so grateful to be included in such an awesome group. Truly these couples are the cream of the crop and inspired me to be better.
Being a leader on trek is a different experience than being part of a "family". So much of what is done is orchestrated so that others will have a pleasant and spiritually uplifting experience. Even something as small as making sure that someone has been asked to give the blessing on the food and the day, is thought out in advance. And as with most things, a lot of flexibility and scrambling during the event is required for everyone else to have a good experience. This isn't to say that I didn't feel the Spirit during the trek. I did. Just probably in different ways and about different things than others did. I think that I will forever think about those handcart company leaders and the missionaries who were on their way home to Utah that were called to assist in an entirely different manner than before. My greatest respect goes out to those who rather than hurrying home as fast as they could, stayed with the pioneer companies to help them along so that they could safely journey to Zion.
2. The youth in our stake are AMAZING! I would say that with very few exceptions, the youth were well prepared- physically, emotionally, and spiritually for the event. Months of preparation and encouragement by their ward trek and youth leaders resulted in youth who truly wanted to feel the Spirit, connect with their pioneer heritage, and learn to love those in their trek families. Each evening when we would gather for a fireside, 200+ youth and their leaders would willingly gather in hopes of feelings the Spirit. So many felt Spiritual promptings and experienced the enabling power of Grace during the long, hot days. Very few complaints were heard. Most wanted so much to do whatever they could do to make the trek a success. I know that the Lord has blessed these young people with valiant hearts and willing hands. I am so grateful for that!
Prior to organizing the youth and mas & pas into families, I spent a lot of time on my knees praying for guidance and understanding. I knew that Heavenly Father knew what kinds of experiences each youth needed. That's not to say that every youth needed an easy experience. Some needed parents who were firm, but loving. Some youth needed to be needed by their families in a unique way. Some needed to experience that no everyone has an "ideal" family. Some needed to learn compassion and patience. And many other experiences were part of those concerns as to where to place each youth. Attending the temple is always a joy for me, but being able to attend with those who I knew were praying for the same kinds of inspiration was a tremendous blessing.
The night of our "Organize Families" meeting, I was feeling peaceful and energized. I have learned a number of things about revelation in the past year. One lesson is that the Lord uses everyone present, not just one person to reveal what needs to be known prior to making a decision. The personal preparation of each person is so important! (It is also vital to have lots of treats to snack on when your meeting goes until 1:30 a.m. Helps people not get cranky!) The youth in our stake should be complimented on how outstanding they truly are. It amazed me how at least one person in the room knew the particular youth we were discussing at any given time. We could discuss their strengths and their possible needs and then jointly determine where they were needed. A few changes were made in the next few weeks, and always the process was the same. Even the changes we made on our way to Wyoming, due to youth who weren't able to come at the last minute, were blessed by the Lord. What a fabulous experience!
3. Enduring to the end can be nerve-wracking! On the second day, the first long mileage day, those last miles were marked as only 3.8 until camp. I think that the missionaries need a new map! That leg of the days' trek was along a gravel road that felt more jarring on the joints than the miles of dirt trail that we had traveled on during the day. Early into that section, a fork appeared in the road. We followed what we felt was the right direction based upon the advice we were given in our training meeting and the map we were given. With confidence we trudged along. However, it just kept going and going! Walking out in front with Pres. Bell, I started to get worried that maybe we'd taken the wrong road. We discussed this possibility and pondered what we should do. We had walked a significant ways ahead of the company trying to see ahead and not get the rest of the company worried. We kept coming back to the tracks in the road ahead of us. The Blue company had traveled the road earlier and we just kept looking at those handcart tracks and foot prints and determined not to panic. Easier said than done. We would approach a hill and would be certain that camp would be just beyond that point. Over and over again our hopes would be dashed as we would crest the hill only to discover no sign of camp and more hills ahead. I truly appreciated the symbolism of that last leg of day two. So often we just have to keep going through difficult things with never-ending supplies of hope that the end is in sight. In 2 Nephi 6:13 we are taught that "they that fight against Zion and the covenant people of the Lord shall lick up the dust of their feet; and the people of the Lord shall not be ashamed. For the people of the Lord are they who WAIT for him; for they still WAIT for the coming of the Messiah." That is what we are waiting for, and continuing our journey in faith and hope so that we will still be ready and waiting upon the Lord when He returns. Very often it is a great comfort to follow the tracks of those who have faithfully walked ahead of us and shown by their example what it means to wait upon the Lord and endure faithfully to the end. I am grateful for those in my ancestry, the pioneers in general, and for the Blue Company on that day of trekking who have continued forward in faith to show me the way I can follow in order to return to my Father in Heaven.
4. Not to burst a bubble, but the Women's Pull wasn't as difficult as I thought it was going to be. This was for a couple of reasons. First, I was blessed to feel an abundance of the Spirit as I talked to the women of Red company before we began our pull. I felt blessed to be there with those wonderful sisters and feel of their love for each other, for the Lord and feel of our Father's love for them. As we sang the first verse of "As Sisters in Zion" the phrase, "we'll all work together" gave me confidence that the Lord had given us the key to getting to the top. Sister Malauna's prayer petitioning our Father in Heaven for His help and expressing gratitude for our blessings was so inspired. I know many of the young women and their mas were feeling very emotional, but a sweet peace and strength settled over my heart. As I stood there wondering where I should help, I looked over and saw that Jordana (one of our captains) on one side of Jadin, a young woman who was struggling physically, but had a determination to make that climb. I knew that I needed to be on the other side of Jadin. On our push to the top, Jordana and I kept checking on Jadin, giving encouragement, assessing her ability to continue, and pushing for all we were worth! Once to the top, we were able to move down the line and help more on their way to the top. The YW kept coming down to the next cart to help push them up the hill. They were exhilarated by their success and wanted to help everyone else as well. This is just how the gospel and Church of Christ works, especially for the sisters. So often we are struggling to pull a difficult load up a very long hill and one of our sisters will come to our rescue and pull and push by our side lending comfort, strength, wisdom, counsel, and love. It is that support that make our journey up those difficult hills less difficult and miserable than they would be alone. We are God's hands and we have covenanted to serve Him. "As Sisters in Zion, we'll all work together. The blessings of God on our labor we'll seek." That happened for me that day. My testimony of the need for us as Saints to love and help each other increased due to my experience on that pull.
5. On Day three I was assigned to follow behind the company and walk with the sister missionary, Sister Bunnage. Ask me anything you want about Sister Bunnage, I bet I know the answer. She was a very gracious, faithful woman whom I was blessed to visit with for many hours. I learned some missionary skills that day. Being genuinely interested in those you are with draws them into your circle of love. Having never served a full-time mission, I've always been a little nervous about how one would approach a prospective investigator. After walking with Sister Bunnage, I realized that it is just about connecting with people and sharing your faith by your words and example. Truly loving all of God's children makes us curious about them and their life's experiences. We are a curious group, members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I can't imagine people not at least being curious as to why we do the things we do. Interestingly, that's exactly what happened with the hiker, Bobby. He was led by a curiosity and as a result, we were able to share some of what is most important to us as members with a man who genuinely wanted to know why we were doing this trek out in the middle of Nowhere, Wyoming. Great missionary lessons for me.
6. Rock Creek Hollow. For me, this was the one place I really wanted to visit on trek. I have felt compelled for months to visit that sacred spot. Someday, I will return to that spot and find an uninterrupted hour to sit and contemplate. As it was, I'm grateful to have been able to have paused for a few moments to thank my Heavenly Father for the journey so many made and sacrificed so much that I might have so many blessings in my life. Being able to go to the temple almost anytime I want I'm sure is something that these early pioneers could hardly comprehend, but it is their sacrifice to come to Zion and desire to build the kingdom of God on earth that began the legacy that has resulted in me being able to get in my car, drive a few minutes and be able to enter a temple of God on the earth. Rock Creek Hollow is symbolic of that ultimate sacrifice many made for the Gospel's sake. What am I willing to sacrifice? So often I complain about not having enough time to do the things that need to be done. I need to be willing to sacrifice more of my time for the gospel's sake.
7. One's attitude is directly related to one's positive experiences. Since coming home I've heard the whole gamut of experiences from youth and adults. Everything from life changing to terrible. What I've come to realize is that it's the attitude and preparation that one started with that made the difference. For many who were looking forward to the experience and had taken the time to prepare physically, emotionally and spiritually, it was a wonderful experience. For those who went merely to fulfill an obligation, but didn't put forth any extra effort or expectation, it was okay. For those who had a bad attitude and a skeptical outlook, the experience was difficult and likely will not be looked on as positive. I feel sad for those who didn't get out of it what they could have done. I don't think the trek had to be life changing in order for it to be a positive and beneficial experience. I do think that one's willingness to be open to feeling the Spirit and looking for those opportunities is key to having a successful experience. For me, it is often in reflecting on what happened that the blessings are made evident. As I've talked with others about their experiences, it is often the case with them as well. Sometimes the limitations of youth makes it difficult to process and be aware of the blessings even after unless some extra time and effort is spent trying to sort things out. Not every youth is willing to do that. I'm grateful for those wards who took a few weeks to have follow up lessons and sacrament meetings in an attempt to help others recognize the lessons of trek.
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